A funeral poem is a piece of verse or prose that is read during a funeral service as a tribute to the deceased. It can express deep sorrow, celebrate the person's life, or offer comfort to the bereaved. These poems can be original works penned by friends or family, or they can be classic pieces that resonate with the feelings of those present.
Why Include a Funeral Poem in a Service?
A funeral poem can add depth and emotional resonance to a funeral service. It provides a platform for expressing grief, celebrating the life lived, or encapsulating shared memories. Funeral poems can be woven into various parts of the service. They can be used as part of the eulogy, as standalone readings, or even printed in the order of service for attendees to read in their own time. You can consult with the funeral director or celebrant for advice on the best way to include a poem in the service.
What Makes a Good Funeral Poem?
A good funeral poem is one that speaks to the heart, that resonates with the audience and offers comfort in its words. It should reflect the personality, life, and values of the deceased. Like Rosy the British Humanist Association also states on their website that the best poems are those that give voice to grief, yet also remind us of the joy and love that life brings.
How Long Should a Funeral Poem Be?
There is no fixed length for a funeral poem. It can be as short as a few lines or as long as a full-page. The average length of a poem is around 569 words however, the most important aspect is that the poem should effectively express the sentiments of the moment. Remember, the purpose of the poem is to pay tribute to the departed and bring comfort to those in attendance. Therefore, it's the content and the emotions conveyed that matter more than the length.
Who Typically Reads or Recites Funeral Poems?
Anyone close to the deceased can read or recite a funeral poem. It could be a family member, a close friend, or even a celebrant leading the service. The key is to choose someone who feels comfortable doing so and who can deliver the poem with the emotion and respect it deserves.
Should I Practise Reading the Funeral Poem Beforehand?
Yes, it's advisable to practise reading the funeral poem beforehand. This allows you to familiarise yourself with the flow of the words and manage your emotions better when reading it in front of others. It might also be helpful to have a backup reader, in case you find it too difficult to read the poem on the day of the service.
Why Do We Use Poems at Funerals? The History Behind It
While it's difficult to pinpoint specific dates in the history of funeral poetry, due to its deep and wide-ranging roots in human culture, there are several key periods and events that influenced its evolution.
Funeral poetry dates back to the Ancient Period (around 8th century BCE) with the Greeks using elegiac verses in rites. This tradition also appeared during China's Han Dynasty (206 BCE – 220 CE) where scholars composed funeral verses. The Middle Ages (5th to 15th century) saw a rise in elegies in European literature, and the tradition notably grew during the Victorian Era (1837 - 1901) with significant contributions from poets like Alfred Lord Tennyson, Emily Dickinson, and Thomas Hardy. In the Modern Era (20th century onwards), both traditional and contemporary funeral poems remain a cherished part of memorial services.
These are broad timeframes, highlighting the enduring presence of poetry in funeral traditions. The exact usage and practices would have varied greatly depending on the specific culture and period.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I handle emotions while reading a funeral poem?
Reading a funeral poem at a loved one's service can be emotionally challenging. One strategy is to practise reading the poem aloud several times beforehand to familiarise yourself with the words and emotions.
Can I use song lyrics as a funeral poem?
Yes, song lyrics can be used as a funeral poem if they convey the sentiments you wish to express. Songs often carry deep emotional resonance and can serve as a powerful tribute. However, do ensure they are appropriate for the occasion.
Can I use a funeral poem in a eulogy?
Absolutely. A funeral poem can be a poignant addition to a eulogy, offering comfort and connection in the face of loss.
Can I include humour in a funeral poem?
Yes, if humour was a significant part of the deceased's personality or if it helps express your feelings of loss, it can be included in the funeral poem. It's important, however, to be sensitive to the feelings of others at the service.
Can I include a favourite quote as part of a funeral poem?
Certainly. Including a favourite quote can add a personal touch to a funeral poem and serve as a reflection of the deceased's values or outlook on life.
Are religious funeral poems appropriate for non-religious services?
It depends on the context and the audience. If the poem's message is universal and comforting, it might be appropriate, but it's crucial to respect the beliefs of the deceased and the attendees.
Can I write my own funeral poem?
Yes, writing your own funeral poem can be a deeply personal and therapeutic way to express your grief and pay tribute to your loved one.
Can I use a funeral poem for an obituary?
Absolutely. A funeral poem can be a meaningful addition to an obituary, helping to encapsulate the life and spirit of the deceased.
Can I request a specific funeral poem to be read at my own funeral?
Yes, including a specific poem in your funeral plan can be a way to share your beliefs, values, or feelings with your loved ones.